Tag Archive | humor

My dog has OCD!

My dog Teddy has OCD! When I told our vet he was eating material, she said he was a little OCD. WTF!?!?!?!?!? We’ve had him for five years, and love him to pieces, but he eats fabric. Not so much just chewing, but actually eating the material. He has chewed holes in our bedding, destroyed his dog bed and makes his dog blankets look like Swiss cheese. The little stink chews holes in our blanket while he’s sleeping with us. He doesn’t seem like he’s nervous and is a total cuddle bug. He was a rescue so we don’t know what kind of a situation he came from. Jesus, you would think after five years he would chill.

He’s so darn cute I just can’t be mad at him. Besides he hasn’t chewed up any of my shoes, yet.

New dog bed, for other dog. Teddy ate his last bed.

Look at the face, how can you not just smother him with kisses? I’m such a sucker. Big sigh.

Marc Anthony Oil of Morocco Argan Oil Hairspray-Review

Jan24

This is some kick ass hairspray! I’ve tried so many different hairsprays over the years. I paid $8.99 at Ulta. I got a sample in one of my Ipsy.com packages. It’s lightweight, but has great hold. I’ve tried alcohol free sprays, and they were awful. Very stiff and helmet head like. This spray is not only not sticky, but adds a bit of shine to your hair. You can easily comb through your hair, and it doesn’t leave any residue. It has Keratin along with Argan oil, and UV protection. It’s humidity resistant too!

My new favorite hairspray! Thanks Ipsy.com and Ulta!

http://www.ulta.com/ulta/browse/productDetail.jsp?productId=xlsImpprod5250301

It’s official! Do they have an 12 step program for Ulta????

Jan19

Good grief! I got an email from Ulta today informing me of my platinum status. Cripes, I went there 36 times in 2014, and spent $962!

Even though I spent $962 I probably got at least $1500 worth of stuff using coupons, points etc. Maybe I should buy some Ulta stock.

I think I need to get out more, just not to Ulta! No wait, who am I kidding. That ain’t happening anytime soon.

This is what happens when you don’t smoke or rarely drink. Maybe I should take both of those things up and quit shopping so much.

Quick hair styling tip

Jan18

When styling your day after hair, instead of adding more styling product, simply mist your hair with water. This will reactivate the product you already have on. This only works if you are using heat on your hair. Otherwise you will just end up with a wet head.

Suave Professionals Volumizing Mousse-Review

Jan18

This a great mousse if you have fine, curly hair. I’ve been using it for several months and have seen a big difference in how full my hair looks. I can wear my hair naturally curly, and it’s not frizzy at all. Best part it’s only $2.88 at Wal-Mart. I’ve tried so many mousses over the years, and this is by far the best.

Suave Professional Volumizing Mousse 1-17-15.jpg-1-17-15 Me

A retouched photo, only because the original was too dark. And I seemed to have lost an eyebrow in the process.

http://www.walmart.com/ip/Suave-Professionals-Volumizing-Mousse-7-oz/16618906

NYX Tinted Brow Mascara Blonde-Review

Jan14

This a great eyebrow color if you have light eyebrows like me. I’ve tried pencils and powders in the past, but was starting to veer off into Joan Crawford land. Not a good look for a middle aged woman. My mom use to get her eyebrows dyed dark brown. They looked ridiculous as she was a red head, plus she was the neighborhood Avon lady so she should have known better.

This is a very natural looking color and stays on all day. I wear glasses so I’m fairly lazy when it comes to my brows. I should probably tweeze more, but I really don’t care. Besides I have poor vision and I can barely see to put make up on. I bought at where else- Ulta for $6.99, but I had a store coupon so it was less than $6!

Ulta Freebies

Jan14

Is it possible to be in love with a store? It sounds so wrong, on so many levels, but I love Ulta! I went today (my second trip this week) to get some skin care products and got a ton of freebies. It’s my birthday so I got a free Ulta eye shadow palette with five yummy brown shades, plus $10 off anything in the store. The Mario Badescu skin care I purchased was supposed to come with a nice gift. They didn’t have the gift, so they gave me a whole bunch of great samples. They actually goofed up and gave me an extra skin care freebie package. I didn’t realize I got the extra package until I got home. Score one for me!

I purchased the following Mario Badescu items:

Oil Free Moisturizer with a 30 SPF-$28

Glycolic Foaming Cleanser-$16

Cellufirm Drops-$25

Hyaluronic Eye Cream-$18

I got everything for $59! Woo hoo! I used my $10 certificate and rewards points to save $28! I’ll do a review once I have used the skin care for several weeks. I did a lot of research before my purchase, and everything I bought was highly rated. Given the moderate price of the skin care and the generous sizes, I’m excited to see the results. I assumed the Mario products were high priced since they are in the same section as the high end skin care at Ulta. This line has been around since 1967, so they must be doing something right. Stay tuned.

Getting your orange on at the 2015 Golden Globes

Jan13

I just read the funniest article about all the fake tans at this year’s Golden Globe awards. I find it so amusing with all the money these folks have they still end up looking like an oompa loompa. Now I’ve been using fake bake since the 70’s, and I never looked orange. Well, there was that one time at the Indy 500, where I had to wear long pants because of my orange legs, and it was like a 100 degrees with a million percent humidity. (Okay, I’m exaggerating, but it was hotter than hell).

I used Coppertone Quick Tan or QT when I was in high school. I’m a fair haired gal so I don’t really get tan, I get red. I actually use to use a tanning lamp on my face. I would get a toasty shade of red, then mix with the orange of the QT for a great fake tan. I cringe when I think of how many times I burned myself to a crisp just to be tan. It was all the rage back then. If you were still pale in May, you were a loser. Now I don’t step outside unless I have a 30 SPF on.

This is horrible, but for the 1970’s it worked.

This is how you do fake bake-me in 1976

When I go somewhere tropical for vacation now, you can’t even tell I went anywhere. Having a pre-cancerous lesion cut off my shoulder in my mid-thirties cured me of the tanning crap. My goofball older sister (she’s 16 years older than me) would go to a tanning booth before going to Florida to “get a base”, when she was in her 60’s. Now she’s super wrinkled, and I’m not.

I still do the fake bake, but I’m pretty sure I haven’t been orange since the Indy 500, in 1981.

Ipsy January 2015 Glam Bag Review

Jan12

Oh Ipsy.com we’ve been seeing each other for more than two years now, and you still amaze me every month. Why just yesterday I was telling a saleslady at Ulta all about you. I couldn’t believe she had never heard of you. I gave her the quick low down. GO AND SIGN UP FOR IPSY NOW! I think there may be a waiting list. I was getting a mini facial, trying out the Mario Badescu skin care line (which I loved), when I brought you up.

I was so hoping I would get my Jan. bag before my birthday, and I did. Here’s what I got this month:

All Over Shadow brush-Elizabeth Mott-value $9.99-OMG! I love it! Very soft and densely packed bristles.

(Malin+Goetz) Mojito Lip Balm- value $12- a luscious super hydrating gel, not sticky at all.

Bella Pierre Cosmetics shimmer eye shadow in Excite-value $14.99-a white pearlescent loose powder shadow.

Pacifica Natural Mineral Coconut eye shadow in Treasure-I couldn’t find an individual value for this pale bronze shadow, but it’s a really pretty color.

Nourish Organic Renewing Eye Cream with avocado, Moroccan Argan oil, and shea butter. This is so new it doesn’t have a price on the company website. I’m anxious to try it.

The value was well over the measly $10 I paid. I so love a good deal.

If you are thinking about trying a beauty box subscription, I highly recommend Ipsy.com. If I was a crack head, this would be my crack. Kind of like Ulta is my crack. Oh I’m such a goofball. Alas, a well made up goofball.

@ipsy #ipsy #januaryglambag

www.ulta.com

http://www.ipsy.com

Great Clips Review-Don’t let the price fool you!

Jan10

I’ve been spending a small fortune on my hair the past eight years. I was taking my son to my local Great Clips for haircuts; when I started going there for bang trims in between my overpriced haircuts and hair color. I found a great stylist five years ago, but she effed up my hair eighteen months ago, so I went back to the overpriced salon. The thing that sucked was after spending so much money, my hair just looked ok, and I was wearing my hair up 95% of the time.

I have naturally curly fine hair. I usually straighten my hair. If I do wear my hair curly people assume I have a perm. Really?? Do people even perm their hair anymore? Any who, after having Teri cut my bangs for the last eighteen months I decided to let him cut my hair. What a pleasant surprise! He did a great job. I had a photo with me, and I got exactly what I wanted. The price? A mere $13. My old salon was charging $42 and they didn’t even style my hair. I guess I was overpaying for the head massage I got when they shampooed my hair. I gave Teri $25 for my hair cut. He was shocked. I’m guessing most people don’t tip like that at Great Clips. I assumed because he was working at a lower end salon that I wouldn’t get a good cut. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

cornfedcontessa

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