I dropped a piece of jewelry on the floor, and when I bent down to pick it up, I found some Chapstick under my dresser. God knows how long it was under there for. Like the doofus that I am, I used some. Bad idea. Now I have some funky bumps on my lips. That’s almost like picking up food off the floor and eating it. You know the old 5 second rule. One would think by middle age you wouldn’t do stupid crap like that. I guess not.